WHO (OR WHAT) IS GOD?

God's existence is a certainty nearer than the nub that propelled the ink that allowed these itty-bitty sentences to be part of the morning comics. God actually is everything. Yes: that line does resemble classic pantheistic talk. Yes: such talk is a trickle of untremendous treacle. God, though, really is everything -- well, almost everything.
The most beingful of ontologies must contain the assertion that God probably was everything but has been reduced. He had been put on sale, and he didn't sell, and so he was reduced. He now, according to the great arguers, is a lampshade and three ovens. He long had been those, plus a sky, trees, automobiles, and lumps. Well, someone did take his lumps.
God now sits in my garage, and he waits. He is waiting to be picked up. He eventually may be taken to a thrift store and may receive a somewhat good refurbishing. He resembles everything and really is everything and then some, but he is at least as old as our siblings or our grandparents. Praise him!